I read a post on another “expectant” adoptive family’s blog that got me thinking…Actually, her words made me think I am not totally looney – or as looney as I sometimes fear.
The mother was discussing having a physical reaction/link when we have children biologically versus not having one through adoption. She said, “My theory is that this is how God can connect us with each other. How I can already feel a real connection to my child that is living in Ethiopia. I don’t feel any kicking though…”
My Confession: I sleep with a blankie. It is cute – fuzzy brown, and soft green with darling polka dots. My requirement was that it be gender neutral since we don’t know if New Baby will be male or female. It is the first thing I purchased for this new child.
It all started when we were waiting for Ellie Grace. I read that to foster bonding with a baby, you should sleep with a blanket or some such article and then provide it to the baby when they are sleeping. The familiarity of your scent would help in the bonding process. So, I slept with a flower embroidered, lace-edged, white blanket while I waited and waited and waited for Ellie. Ellie came home and slept with that blanket. It didn’t become her favorite and I eventually hung it over her crib. It still hangs over her bed. It is one of my treasures.
Actually, when I think about, it really started when I was carrying Hannah. My favorite time of day was getting in bed with my big ole belly and watching her wake up and move as I settled in to rest. A woman can’t forget the feeling of waking in the middle of the night and rolling over in bed and thinking of the life inside of her.
So, no baby belly. But a mama who wakes in the middle of the night and has something tangible to hold while thinking of and praying for her new child.